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“If you want to know why Harriet Lerner is one of my great heroes, Why Won’t You Apologize? is the answer. This book is a game changer.”

—Brené Brown,  Ph.D., LMSW
    author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Rising Strong

“Harriet Lerner is one hell of a wise woman. She draws you in with deft and engaging prose, and then changes your life with her rigorous intelligence and her deeply human advice. I promise that you will never see ‘the apology’ in quite the same way.”

—Esther Perel, MA, LMFT author of Mating in Captivity

Why Won't You Apologize? sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language—I’m sorry. Dr. Lerner provides a unique perspective on healing broken connections and restoring trust, and turns popular notions about forgiveness on their head. With her trademark humor and wit, Lerner offers a joyful and sanity-saving guide to setting things right.

Get your copy: Amazon / Barnes & Noble / Indiebound


“If you want to learn the art and craft of apology and repair when you’ve hurt someone, this is your book. If you are frustrated with a person who is no good at accepting responsibility for hurting you, this is your book. If you want powerful insights into human relationships, let me say it plainly: This is the best self-help book I’ve ever read!

—William Doherty, Ph.D., professor of Family Social Science at the University of Minnesota, author of Take Back Your Marriage

“Why Won’t You Apologize? is at once practical and profound. It guides us through the most difficult places in human relationships. Read this book, then pass it on to the non- apologizer in your life.”

—Monica McGoldrick, MA, LCSW, Ph.D. (Honorary), Director of the Multicultural Family Institute in Highland Park, New Jersey

 This wise and eminently down-to-earth book is a guide that will last a lifetime and heal the hearts of so many.”

—Dr. Sue Johnson, author of Hold Me Tight and Love Sense

“Why Won’t You Apologize? is an immensely intelligent book. Lerner is an intrepid agent of change. What a gift!"

—Judith V. Jordan, Ph.D., Director of the Jean Baker Miller Training Institute at the Wellesley Center for Women

“With luminous stories and clinical nuance, Harriet Lerner shows us the value and power of apologize. We applaud her achievement, including her compelling analysis of the dynamics of forgiveness. We recommend this book to anyone who has suffered hurt from others or caused others to suffer. Who among us has not done both?”

—Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D., authors of Making Marriage Simple and Getting the Love You Want

“With her signature punch and humor, Harriet Lerner tackles the injuries that occur in marriage, family, and friendship. Her advice for repairing hurts and earning forgiveness is fresh, profound, life-affirming, and immediately useful.”

—Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D., author of After the Affair and How Can I Forgive You?

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