The Dance of Intimacy


"All beginnings are lovely:' a French proverb reminds us, but intimacy is not about that initial "Velcro stage" of relationships. It is only when we stay in relationships over time—whether by necessity or choice—that our capacity for intimacy is truly put to the test.

In this book, Dr. Lerner takes a careful look at those relationships where intimacy is most challenged by too much distance, too much intensity, or simply too much pain. In clear, direct, and dramatic terms Dr. Lerner illustrates how we can move differently in these key relationships—be they with a distant or unfaithful spouse, a depressed sister, a difficult mother, an alcoholic father, an uncommitted lover, a dying parent, or a family member rom whom we are cut off.

The Dance of Intimacy teaches us about "the differences that make a difference"the changes we can make in one or two significant relationships that will change everythingincluding our capacity for intimacy and selfhood over the long haul.


"A wise and compassionate book that will teach a reader much about the complex emotions our family and love relationship engender!"
      - Lillian B. Rubin, Ph.D.
       Author of Intimate Strangers

"Subtle and literate, The Dance of Intimacy is like a long, revealing conversation with a wise and compassionate friend."
- Maggie Scarf
       Author of Unfinished Business

"Dr. Lerner has a truly remarkable ability to analyze our problems with intimacy. She has written a hopeful, respectful and transforming book."
- Carol C. Nadelson, M.D.
       Former president of the American Psychiatric Association

Books & Audio

The Dance of Fear

The Dance of Anger

The Dance of Connection

The Mother Dance

The Dance of Intimacy

The Dance of Deception

Life Preservers: Good Advice When You Need it Most

Women in Therapy

Franny B. Kranny There's a Bird in Your Hair!

What's So Terrible About Swallowing an Apple Seed?

Sounds True Tapes

On Intimacy

On Anger

On Mothers & Daughters

Food, Sex & Relationships


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